Chris CrockettJimmie Johnson Wins AP Athlete Of The Year....WHAT?
December 22nd 2009 15:08
Here is the definition of the word ‘sport’ from Dictionary.com
-noun
1. an athletic activity requiring skill or physical prowess and often of a competitive nature, as racing, baseball, tennis, golf, bowling, wrestling, boxing, hunting, fishing, etc.
I’ve always had some issues with the definition of the word ‘sport.’ That being said, this time I’m fine with it. The ‘racing’ it refers to in the above definition, requires the use of your legs moving rapidly, one foot in front of the other, over and over and over. Not driving! At least, that's my interpretation of it, and I'm sticking to it.
As a wise man once said to me, ‘turning left is not a sport.’ My response to that statement was this, ‘Peeing your pants--while turning left--most definitely is not a sport!’ Now, in my estimation, you must play a ‘sport’ to be considered an athlete, right?
What about Usain Bolt? Roger Federer? Dice-K Matsuzaka? Ok, I’m just seeing if your paying attention with my man Dice K’s nomination there!
Here’s pretty much all I can say. Go get Jimmie and put him out on the tennis court or on the track and I’ll lay down some solid cake that he sucks at both sports. Shit, even throw in Dice-K’s sport of baseball if you want. Now go put Roger, Usain, or even Dice-K in a race car and I guarantee you that all three of them can drive really fast while turning left and peeing themselves. Actually that may be a race I’d pay to see!
The likes of Tiger Woods, Larry Bird, Joe Montana, Lance Armstrong, Michael Phelps, Wayne Gretzky, are now joined by JIMMIE JOHNSON as AP Athlete Of The Year ? What a country huh Jimmie?? Congrats man! Zoom…Zooooooooom…Zooooooooooo oooooooooom!
Chuck
~TCFB~
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Comment by 5280
I don't have stats to back up my assertion here but I bet that I have driven more miles without an accident and finishing that drive on time, if not early, every morning and every night, 5 days a week than the ASSociated press' "athlete of the year".
Chuck, I whole-heartedly agree with you on the rhetorical controversy of what truly defines a sport. Could we please use some common sense here. Even if we accept a broad scope to identify sport, I could think of only one other "athletic endeavour" in which you sit on your ass while doing it. Fishing (jockeys don't sit on the horse in a horse race). If we are talking deep sea fishing or pike fishing, even that takes greater strength than turning a steering wheel, shifting gears and pressing three pedals. And I don't think that fishing is a sport either.
This is just shameless pandering to a market that is more advertising than substance. We have all seen the stickers on these sleds not to mention this gives a shot in the arm to the American auto industry. In this travesty of an economy every little bit helps but let us please not call "left-turning pant-peers" athletes.
Sorry Jeb. En you thot you wuz an athaleet too cuz you drive a chevy.
My favorite of course is every morning some "athlete" passes me in his NASCAR edition Monte Carlo with the stripes, GOODYEAR and ol' number 3 on it. Yeah ladies, I will write down his license plate number so you can do a people-search on him. He has to be one heck of a catch.
Thanks man. It just had to be said.